19 November 2010


This poster was made by Voltaira, a straight, cisgendered Deviant. I think it is beautifully done, and I'd like to share it with you, my readership.

Click for the full-sized image.

I would like to believe that all straights and non-straights can someday believe that they are equal; hopefully, that day will be short in coming.

11 November 2010

XKCD - Purely Statistical Edition

Lately, I've been ravenously devouring the webcomic xkcd. It's kind of like the opposite of Cyanide and Happiness, in that the stick people are extremely intelligent instead of somewhat mindless. Both are extremely funny, and somewhat explicit, so go check them out.
The other thing I've been obsessed with lately is statistics. I'm taking my second round of stats, as it's the math of choice for psychology majors like myself. I'm amazingly good at it, too, which shocks the hell out of me, because normally I'm quite terrible at math. I think I'm better at stats because the numbers actually have a meaning behind them, rather than just arbitrarily existing. When I add two and two, I want to know what significance four has, and statistics does that for me. It's like an academic high, almost--I continuously get As on my homework and tests, and my professor has noticed this. And he's recommended me to departmental honors, which makes me feel super-awesome, being that it's my first semester here.
But, enough gloating. I wanted to share some xkcd strips with you, because they make me feel happy and smart at the same time. (Oh, and to view the strips in all of their full-sized glory, just click them!)

Our professor put this one up for a giggle when we started talking about the correlation coefficient!


04 November 2010

What's the nicest thing someone's ever done for you?

Many people have done many nice things for me. It's rude to pick just one.

Engage me

What was the happiest moment in your life?

It hasn't happened yet.

Engage me

If you could go back in time 10 years and tell your younger self something, what would it be?

Stay awesome. Fifth grade me was totally cool.

Engage me

What was the weirdest gift you ever received?

Spaced Out: The Best of Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner [CD]. I got it for my 20th birthday from my parents, and I LOVE IT!

Engage me

24 October 2010

That's So Honors English

Recently, there have been several LGBT teen suicides. The pressure on these kids, as well as the rest of the LGBT community, is enormous, and many feel that death is their only escape from the hatred that they encounter in their lives. I wrote this paper a few years ago, for my Honors English class, but the message is still as true as it was then. We need to stop perpetuating hate speech in order to push progress forward.

By DeviantArtist Traitors-stead

When you hear something stupid, or see a silly picture, what is your most common response? “That’s so stupid?” “That’s really silly?” That’s probably not the case. As nice as it would be to live in a world where dumb things were simply dumb, this is not reality. In most cases, when something strikes a person as being different, or odd, or oppositional to their own beliefs, they refer to it as “gay.” “Oh my God, that shirt is so gay.” “You listen to that band? You’re such a fag.” The truth is that most people who say these things probably don’t realize the strength their words have. It is most commonly believed that about ten percent of the American populous is LGBT. Despite the fact that this community is a minority, they still have the right to stand up and oppose the deliberate misuse of a once-neutral term for homosexuality. In defense of the LGBT community, the Ad Council has brought forth an award-winning series of commercials dealing with the phraseology “That's so gay.” The clips are about thirty seconds long, but they deliver a strong message, spoken by celebrities that Americans can easily recognize-- Wanda Sykes, who recently came out to the public, and Hilary Duff are in the two most popular of the commercials. Speaking as a friend of several gay people, and as a bisexual, I personally believe that the American people, and young adults in particular, need to come to the realization that their words have power, and can hurt people when taken in the wrong light.

The emotional weight that the LGBT community carries, due to their orientation, has been somewhat lifted in recent years, though it still seems far more acceptable to be straight. With the controversy over gay marriage and equal opportunities, LGBTs have been forced under a spotlight as of late. California's Proposition 8 has drawn a great deal of attention, as have the bans on gay marriage and adoption rights in several states. It may seem, then, that simple words don't matter much in the light of far more serious concerns. Unfortunately, though, the misuse of words like gay, faggot, lesbian, and homo is becoming so prevalent that it, too, as become one of those serious issues. A report by the Ad Council states that “Almost 90% of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) students report being verbally harassed at school because of their sexual orientation”. The majority of the abuse may, in fact, be unintentional because of the adoption of the orientational slurs into the everyday teenage vernacular.

Rationally, fighting the verbal abuse of an already-oppressed group makes perfect sense. Very little separates LGBTs from the so-called “rest” of the population; the separation is what truly makes no sense. Unfortunately, there are those who feel that the commercials that fight against stinging insults are themselves insulting: “This campaign from the Ad Council goes about sharing the love by creating more hate. [Hilary] Duff makes fun of the teenage girl and her ability to shop in order to make her point”. The same sentiment was expressed by several people I have personally addressed, including my own father, who is usually quite supportive of my orientation, but has always expressed a dislike for homosexual males. To him, people who have reacted to the phrase are being oversensitive, and they are simply demanding political correctness. However, while this may just be a pompous demand over childish vernacular, it must be taken into account that the word “gay” has the most commonly accepted, and certainly the friendliest, term used to address a homosexual, male or female, since the 1970s. The fact that this word is also attributed to any negative happenstance that occurs causes its degradation to all people, and takes away its safety to the homosexual community.

In order to inflict change, steps can be taken to show that you care enough about the matter at hand to stand up for it. In this case, those interested in making their mark can go to thinkb4youspeak.com. The site offers several ways to get involved with the effort, including a personal pledge to “Not use anti-LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) language or slurs. Intervene, if you safely can, in situations where students are being harassed. Support efforts to end bullying and harassment”. Visitors to the website can also submit their own ideas for sayings to replace “That's so gay,” as well as send e-cards to spread awareness and to gain further support for this cause. Another option for supporters of the cause is to participate in a Day of Silence. The Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (GSLEN) sponsors several such events throughout the year; the day of silence is typically in the second week of April. The event's website aids potential participants in signing up to be counted, purchasing themed merchandise to advertise, and pages to register GSAs and other advocacy groups for involvement in the Day. Finally, the simplest way to curb the phrase “That's so gay,” and other similar phrases, is to stop saying it yourself. Check yourself when you see something that strikes you as dumb or stupid, and watch your tongue. If one of your friends says the phrase, ask them why. Make them think before they just utter pointless, hurtful chatter. All of the groups, advertisements, and events can never compare with the small act of one person addressing another; one heart needs to touch another if this movement can make headway.

By saying “That's so gay,” the speaker, whether or not they realize it, demeans the entire homosexual populous. The phrase spreads a sort of subconscious homophobia, which has turned viral in recent years. Despite its widespread use, though, change can happen, if people realize that what they are saying is very wrong, and sounds completely nonsensical and unintelligent. Words have power, whether they are used properly or improperly. Consider the way you would feel if, instead of saying “gay,” the common phrase was “That's so straight.” While most people do not solely define themselves by their sexual orientation, having a word that describes it used as an insult can be hurtful nonetheless. You probably wouldn't like to have an essence of yourself, a part of your life, targeted and trivialized. It shouldn't be cool to say that something is gay. This phrase should not be socially acceptable. Think about the words you use to describe the strange, the odd, the down-right stupid. And for those of you who do say “That's so gay,” knock it off!


13 October 2010

Career Choices in Psychology and Other, Completely Unrelated Industries

After completing the O*NET Skills Search, I was matched with a rather surprising 254 different careers, including my current chosen occupational path, that of a marriage and family therapist. In fact, many of the careers had to do with mental health, as well as health services in general. I was given a rating of ‘Bright Outlook’ in 108 of these career options; my concentration was unfortunately not included in this list. I pride myself on being a well-rounded person, but some of the choices I was matched with surprised even me. With that in mind, I find this test to be a tad broad, and I feel that it needs many more options, in order to hone in on the true occupational skills of the taker. However, I still enjoyed taking the test, mostly because the enormity of my list made me giggle quite a bit. As per my psychological forum teacher's instruction, here is my evaluation of three of my matched careers, all of which I chose because they seem humorous.

Career 1 – Clergy

And I want to look just like this guy. Holy crap is he awesome.

I have a bright future as a pastor, it would seem. While I can understand how my fabulous interpersonal skills and penchant for writing long papers that read like sermons might apply in this area, my absolute terror for public speaking eliminates this as a possibility. Also, in my chosen flavor of Christianity, Missouri Synod Lutheranism, women are not permitted to become anything higher than a deaconess. While I don’t agree with that particular belief, I don’t plan on converting any time soon, so don’t expect to see me at the pulpit.

Career 2 – Actuary

Punk actuaries. Hard-core!

Admittedly, I didn’t know exactly what an actuary was until I read the description. However, I think I might be pretty decent at that. Despite my less-that-perfect grades, I love statistics. It’s the only math that makes any sense to me. And while running stats on risk factors might get depressing, if not boring, I’d still be better at crunching those numbers than being a ‘Municipal Fire Fighting and Prevention Supervisor’, which is by far the weirdest choice on my humongous list of careers that I am mostly unqualified for in real life.

Career 3 – Food Scientists and Technologists

I just can't take the word 'food' seriously as an adjective.

How I was matched with a career in science absolutely baffles me. I distinctly remember not checking the ‘Science’ checkbox, because science, along with math, is not my strong point. Seeing as the first two words in the job description are ‘use chemistry’, I cannot explain why this would ever be a good career path for me. I can just see myself ‘discover[ing] new food sources’ that eventually turn out to be toxic, or exploding a taco while I’m analyzing its ‘food content’. Science and I simply don’t mix.

Using O*NET’s skill search was fun, if pointless. A small handful of the surplus of matches I procured were actually jobs I feel I could pursue successfully. As a whole, I liked this assignment, and hope that future assignments are as amusing.

26 September 2010

So I Put My Hands Up (And Promptly Clamped Them Over My Ears)

Let me start out by telling you that my exposure to Miley Cyrus up to this point was minimal. That's a difficult thing to attain when one lives in a household with two young girls. Fortunately, I conditioned them to understand that Hannah Montana might possibly be the anti-Christ, and to not watch her show. I hope you know I'm kidding about the anti-Christ part. She's probably Satan herself. And so, my sisters developed into pretty decent tomboys, although they still like iCarly and the Suite Life shows, which I honestly can't say I mind, because I like them, too.
But my affinity for children's television isn't the subject of this blog. Miley Cyrus is. I have had to endure that retched 'Party in the USA' twice now, with absolutely no escape. For some reason, EIU plays it at football games over the PA system. I have stood amidst a crowd full of people that I had camaraderie with not seconds before--due to the matching T-shirts, face paint, and hoarse voices that are Panther Nation--and was baffled as to why they were waving their hands in the air to what sounds like a chipmunk gasping for air. Her actual singing voice sounds like the voice I do when I poke fun at pop singers. She literally sounds like a joke to me. I can't walk out of the stadium, because enough people already have; our team isn't exactly the greatest, but aren't we expected to cheer harder for them when they're down? Panther Nation is a pep club, which to me means that we cheer no matter what, not leave in droves when the game starts to suck. But that's a rant for a different day.
This isn't to say that college football games were my first exposure to Miley Cyrus; they were simply my first unavoidable brush with the little demon. The first Miley Cyrus song I ever heard was 'Can't Be Tamed', and I chose to watch the video because there was an article about it on Yahoo News that day. It appears to me that her video is an audition for the Junior Miss Lady GaGa pageant. Just as GaGa has been a tad too Madonna-esque lately--see 'Alejandro'--Miley has skanked it up with an unholy marriage of all things Lady GaGa and Britney Spears. It's creepy, and the little kids who once followed her don't like it. Seriously. However, that song is fathoms better than 'Party in the USA', and if they play at games, I might sing along. If Justin Bieber starts playing, though, I'll walk out, no matter how much the team needs me.

18 September 2010

The Dorm Life of Freak and Sushi

NOTE: If and when my sister Ladybug ever reads this post, she will flip her shit for the title. She's completely obsessed with one of the twins on The Suite Life of Zach and Cody. Only one of the twins, though.

I am sitting at my school-sanctioned desk, drinking a cup of extremely strong, possibly radioactive coffee that I just reheated in the industrial microwave in the kitchen. The microwave hums whenever someone opens it, and it reminds me irrevocably of a nuclear reactor. My roommate, Freak, is either sleeping or staring at the ceiling, but she has promised pancakes whenever she emerges from her side of the room. Lately she has been taken with randomly singing like an aging black gospel singer, and the fact that she is neither black nor aging doesn't seem to bother her in the slightest. I've been looking at the website Regretsy for days now, because it makes me laugh at humanity, and because I still don't have a great deal of homework. All of these random sentences are culminating in a blog entry that I don't honestly see an end to. I could do this all day. Like I said, not much homework.
So, pretty much every day, I do the same thing. I wake up in the morning--not feeling like P. Diddy--around 8AM, so I have plenty of time to take a shower or check my mail before I head for class at about ten 'til 9. Most days, I have class for five straight hours, with no breaks, which is a total kill-joy, but I can't complain because I planned it that way. I have absolutely no reason to skip classes when they're back-to-back. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I have little to no classes, so I read, or do homework, or go to Wal-Mart. There's no mall or anything like that in Charleston, so it's either 'go to Wal-Mart' or 'wither away into nothingness from the boredom'. Maybe that's a tad extreme, though. I'll have plenty to do with the student organizations I've joined once school truly gets into gear.
I think my favorite part of living on campus is that fact that I can walk to the library in under a minute. And we have an amazing library; the entire fourth floor is A/V and music books, the first floor has an extremely eclectic graphic novels section that I am readily devouring, and really, it's just a beautiful building to behold. Not as gorgeous as Doudna, which I wrote about in a past entry, but still.
More about dorm life later; we're having a stand-up comedy marathon. Because someone is holding all of the Harry Potter movies in our library system hostage...

14 September 2010

I Am Old.

So, yesterday I turned twenty. And I feel weird about being twenty, because I've had the -teen suffix for so long now. It was also weird not having my family around for the first time. However, I did get to party. The local LGBT group, EIU Pride, had their welcome reception yesterday, and not only did I go, but I also helped plan it and purchase food and decorations. I like to get involved. So, I was there for about three hours, and then I went back to the dorm to eat Jello and open presents. I got a signed picture of Leonard Nimoy, which is now hanging above my bed to watch over me. I also got the single weirdest CD I have ever heard of: "Spaced Out: The Very Best of Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner". The best track, of course, is 'Ballad of Bilbo Baggins', which Spock and I use to annoy the hell out of each other. In case you haven't been subjected to it yet, here you go. Dig that crazy bassoon! I also got some fun trinkets from my aunt in Southern Illinois; the bunches of matching oriental stuff made me smile.
For my birthday, despite the fact that it was yesterday, I will do a list of...
20 Things that Make Me Smile
In no particular order
1. Babies laughing

2. Smiley faces in food

3. Playing cards

4. Rainbows

5. Watching scary movies with my dad

6. Halloween shopping

7. Being in love

8. Portal

9. Making avatars

10. Lolcats

11. Rush

12. Living with one of my best friends

13. Spock [my Spock, the original Spock, any Spock, really]

14. Tetris

15. Lady GaGa parodies that don't insult Lady GaGa herself

16. Singing

17. My mom

18. Rock Band

19. Lego versions of pretty much anything

20. Birthdays

Thanks for smiling with me!

02 September 2010

A Benevolent Textatorship

Call me a whiner, but I'm concerned about the people in my generation being unleashed into the working world, particularly those who are going into my field, psychology. I think about ninety percent of the psych majors I've met absolutely terrify me. Not just because they're morons, and they don't actually care about other people, but also because they just can't seem to put away their damn cell phones. The typical psych major, as well as most of my other peers, has a general lack of regard for others. They will tap away on their cellphones, whether they are alone, or in a group of friends, or in the classroom where they are supposed to be learning about the nuances of their chosen profession. What is going to happen when these people look up, and see that the world has changed around them? That they are not the center of the universe, and that the rest of Earth's inhabitants don't revolve around them?
What I'm trying to say is this: would you want to deal with a therapist who snuck glances at a cell phone when you were trying to divulge your problems to them? When they were supposed to be paying attention to only you, and not the person on the other line? And what if that other person is a surgeon, who perhaps was texting away during the lecture that taught them how to perform the operation they need to do on the human being in front of them? I don't want any doctor from my own generation working on me. I'm afraid of them, and I'm afraid of literally everyone else my age, because of this reasoning.
I have sat in classrooms when literally everyone surrounding me was texting. And the teachers, despite what they have all said during syllabus week, do nothing. It's very distracting. That little 'tick tick tick' or 'tap tap tap' of a cell phone keyboard as the texter creates some abomination of grammatical errors to send to the recipient, who is probably also sitting in class, distracting someone else like me, while another teacher does nothing. It's sick. I think I'm going to stick by my plan in high school and become a hermit by age thirty. I despise cell phones; I hate having one, and I hate using them. I hate the fact that I had to get texting back on my phone, after blissful years without it, so that I can communicate with my friends who, God forbid, hopefully don't text in class.
I probably sound insane for saying all this, but somewhere, deep down inside you, you know it to be true. Think about it: college is the time when our minds are most malleable, when we condition ourselves to become our future selves. The texter is conditioning their belief system to include an allowance for texting when others are present. In other words, their moral system states that it's perfectly fine to ignore the people in their presence in favor of a person that could be miles away, in the form of a small, technology-packed telephone. What about the people who will depend on these texters to make them well? And in the case of educators, what about the children who depend on these people to teach them? I fear that our world is doomed.

May Stephen King's glorious vision in Cell one day come true.

22 August 2010

On the Prowl

This is the last day of my first weekend at Eastern. I moved into my dorm on Thursday, and have been attending Prowl, the orientation program for new students, all weekend long. Spock was a big help moving me in, and, before we even got there, calming my nerves after my dad got into a wreck on the highway. I know it's only been a few days, but I have really acclimated to the college environment. I've found some of my friends, made some new ones, and hung out with my roommate, the amazing Freak. Eastern is really big on self-advertisement; I already have two t-shirts, a backpack, and a water bottle, all plastered with the EIU logo. I never mind free things, though. Freak and I have been having a great time just laying around watching TV, but we'll have to cut back when school starts tomorrow.
Currently, we're watching The Dark Knight, which is funny, considering that our dorm's theme is Batman. We also bought Batman Begins and Watchmen from Walgreens, which is a few blocks away. In short, I'm having a ridiculously good time. The only down-side is that I miss Spock, and my other friends and family.

13 August 2010

New Zazzle Items for Little Monsters

For some reason, the phrase 'GaGa in the Haus!' has been rolling around in my head. I figured enough people like Lady GaGa that they might buy a shirt with that phrase on it, so I've decided to add some new apparel to my Zazzle store. Also, I've been trying to cook up some items that people will actually buy, because I'm getting worried about money for school. I put up more 'Spock is my copilot' items, as well as some other neat things. So, my readership, unleash that Little Monster within you, and go buy some cool stuff!

08 August 2010

Twi-hard Fan

I must apologize on two accounts.
First, I haven't blogged in a ridiculously long time. Between packing for school, throwing a graduation party so wicked that my dad had to go to the hospital, and playing far too much Rock Band 2, I just haven't found the time. And for that, I'm sorry.
I'm also sorry for the reason I have dragged myself back online; it's not pleasant. Don't worry, nobody died or anything. To make a long story short, Bella Swan stole my birthday. Or, to be fair, Stephanie Meyer gave it to her. Let me explain. Lately, I've been suffering through the Twilight series, at the request of Spock's grandmother. She asked that I read the series, which she enjoyed, before complaining about it anymore. She even went so far as to purchase the books for me. [Secondhand, thank goodness, but still. They are festering in my home now.] The only one she couldn't find for me was New Moon, so I got it from the library, and am currently being tortured into reading. On page six, the victim reader finds out that Bella's birthday is September 13th. Which also happens to be the day I WAS BORN. I did the math, and technically she is two years older than me, but given that I was spawned into meathood before she was vomited onto the page, it was my birthday first. If I may be so childish. Meathood? Really? That may well be the strangest sentence I have ever written in my life.
So, in honor of my re-renewed hatred of Twilight, I present to you...

Seventeen Exemplary Examples of Anti-Twiligt Fan-Art
From our friends at DeviantART!

One last thing. Today [well, yesterday now, I guess] is Faythe's 21st birthday! Ahahaha, she's so OLD now! Just kidding. Please don't kill me.

20 July 2010


Spock and I are on vacation, for the first time ever [with each other, that is]! We trekked [ha HA!] for five hours in the blistering Illinois heat--especially when my air conditioning quit working--to visit Spock's paternal grandparents downstate. We also managed to stall out my car, and I almost fainted! This is high adventure, readership!
So far, it's been nice here. Their house is nerve-wrackingly clean, especially when compared with his maternal grandparents. So, it'll take some getting used to, but other than that, I think I'll get along just fine. We watched Tropic Thunder last night, and will probably devour chunks of their extensive movie library over the course of the week.
On a sadder note, Freak and her boyfriend broke up, but I have absolutely no idea why. It still makes me sad though; Vito seemed like a decent guy. Not too pleased about being called an asshole on Freak's Facebook wall, though. Especially by someone who's got their own vendetta against me, and--
Umm... Enough drama. I'm going to have fun on this vacation if it kills me.

17 July 2010

Little Monsters Unite!

A sick thing happened today. Anyone who hasn't been hiding under a rock knows that the music video for Lady Gaga's 'Bad Romance' has held the most-viewed spot on Youtube for months now. I'm one of the people who helped it get there, and maybe you are, too. Well, we have to do it again. As of today, Mama Monster has been pushed out of the top spot by none other than, dare I say it... Justin Bieber. Some nauseating tripe that spewed forth from the gob of the Biebs is the Number #1 video on Youtube. Needless to say, this must be stopped. So, my part is to watch the video over and over, and to stay THE HELL away from the Biebs' bullshit; the name of the song is 'Baby', for Pete's sake. Would you be so kind as to do the same?

Together, we can put Gaga back where she belongs: on top.
P.S. I'm just crazy as hell sometimes, aren't I?

16 July 2010


So, I figured out something that will cheer me up: having another contest! I am combining my love of photography and of lolcats, and unveiling the

LOL My Cat Contest!

Are you as excited as I am? I DON'T THINK YOU ARE! To be brief, I will be providing six pictures that I took of my cat, Peppermint, on a day when she looked particularly hilarious. If those pictures aren't enough, hopefully someone will comment. Anyway, I'm looking for some good lolcat pictures, ten probably, submitted by my readers. If you have Photoshop, that's super, but you can also use the Cheezburger network Lolcat Builder. All in all, I want you guys to have fun with this, and once we have enough, we'll vote on whichever one is the most epic. I will come up with a prize. Maybe a stuffed cat? I can't give you my cat, though. That's just silly.

LOL My Cat Pictures: Photobucket / Facebook
Cheezburger LOL Builder: here
Submit entries: here

Have fun with it!

14 July 2010

I May Have Lost My Touch

I really want to write a post tonight... er, this morning. Whatever. I seem to have lost sight of what I wanted to do with my blog. I look back, and I see a ton of movie reviews, and not a whole lot else. And yeah, a lot of my summer has involved going to the movies. I think I've gone at least a dozen times. Spock and I just saw Iron Man 2 last weekend. It was the second time I'd seen it, since the whole family went on Independence Day. But anyway, I feel sort of bad about just writing about movies. And then there was that post that was just a rant about my ex, Nietzsche. It just hasn't been a note-worthy summer, for the most part. Possibly, I just don't have a note-worthy life. But, I keep on truckin', or I guess Trekkin', being an unholy nerd and all.
I used to truly fancy myself a writer. It was my dream to be published, but until that day came, I knew I would write and write, and write some more. Until something stuck, you know? Until I actually found something worth writing an entire novel, or short story, or even poem about. And now, well, I think my brain may be deteriorating. I can barely go a day without forgetting how to spell a word, or not being able to articulate what the word even means. This, from the girl who was dubbed all throughout school as 'The Human Dictionary'. Now, I sit around every day, wondering what to write about, and almost nothing comes anymore. It's extremely frustrating, and I think that it may be contributing to my current bout of depression. I had originally worked this blog out. I was going to write, and have lists, and people would be intrigued by what I had to say. Instead, I have seven followers on the actual blog, and twelve on Facebook. And I'm related to three of them. So much for intriguing the masses. And it's not like I don't try to put the word out; I back-link all over the place. Any comment section that asks for a website, there's a link here. Any status message on any gaming site I use links here. I feel really naive about the whole thing.
And don't think that I'm quitting. No, I'm not giving up. I'm just not going to care as much, I suppose. And certainly not set my standards so high.

09 July 2010

High Water

Yesterday, Spock and I made the long trek to the Charter One Pavilion in Chicago, in order to see Rush. During the earlier part of the week, I meticulously planned out exactly how we were to get there, to the point of separating the money we needed into baggies. I shit you not. We arrived at the pavilion about an hour early, to a torrential downpour that appeared nowhere in the weather forecast. After having our tickets checked at the gate, we were given ponchos, which was awesome. What wasn't so awesome was that everything in my purse, including our tickets and directions home, was soaked. And continued to be soaked as I had to pull the tickets out time and again to prove that we truly were in the venue legitimately.
After navigating through the drunks, stoners, swag-hawkers, and other assorted Rushians, we made it to our seats. From there, we watched as the rain cut through the crowd like rusty scissors as we huddled under our complimentary ponchos. We could clearly see the stage, and watched as someone who appeared to be Geddy Lee popped onto the stage, and then ducked under a curtain which presumably led to the backstage area. A half-hour after the concert was supposed to begin, a random guy came up on stage and told us that our beloved Rush was rained out. And we were pissed. Spock, who is always calm, was calm, but me... well, I swore up a storm with the rest of the Rushians. And we wished it was a joke, but it wasn't. We were to check our e-mail for messages from Live Nation. And this funny thing happened. The only thing I got from them was a link to fill out a survey about how much I loved the concert. Spock had to pull me away from the keyboard before I released an acidic tirade of angry fanatic bile. Our tickets said 'Rain or Shine', and I was livid about the venue going back on their end of the bargain. At least, I was until I understood what actually happened. I settled down after learning that our heroes may have been electrocuted if they had played for us. The only thing I wish had happened differently was if one of the guys told us, instead of some random dude. Mama Bear, though, thought that it may have started a riot. Such is life, I suppose. Rumor has it that the reschedule will be in September, right close to my birthday. The trouble with such a date is that I'll be in school by then. Looks like I need to establish my priorities.
Yours "In the Mood", "In the End", and anywhere "Beneath, Between, and Behind",

04 July 2010

Keine Worte

NOTE: I apologize in advance for injecting so much of my personal life into this entry. I've been mostly writing about movies and events, so of course it will seem a little odd when I just talk about myself. However, if I just keep all this weirdness inside, I may explode. The title of the post, by the way, means 'No Words' in German, a language that I sometimes revert to when English doesn't have pretty enough words to describe the way I feel.

I never saw this coming. I thought he was through with Spock, and I already knew he was through with me. His name, for our purposes, will be Nietzsche, for the famous "God is dead" philosopher who was his hero for so long. It has been almost year since we parted, on the most unpleasant of circumstances. As I have already written that story once, I'll direct you to it for reference: Click here.. The shorter version, for those of you who can't access the page [it may be blocked for those who aren't members of DeviantART], is that on Nietzsche's birthday, Spock and I went to his house to throw a small party. A lot of thought went into it, and when he appreciated absolutely none of it, I flipped my lid a little bit. I had already been taking medication for depression, and the dosage was high enough that it was actually doing more harm than good, and thoroughly destroyed my sense of self-preservation. After weeks of my phone calls and emails remaining unanswered, I did the worst thing possible--I tried to kill myself by overdosing on pills and cough syrup. I spent four days in the hospital; it would have been longer if insurance had allowed. While I was in the hospital, I left him a crazed voicemail, breaking up with him and calling him all sorts of names.
Months after I was released from the hospital, I attempted to apologize through email, but the only reply I received was "Please never message me again." So, I took to forgetting about him, and trying to be a better girlfriend to Spock, who was once Nietzsche's best friend. But now, a strange tide has turned. While checking his Facebook, Spock got a friend request from Nietzsche. He accepted it, mostly because I asked him to. Even after all the nastiness that came between Nietzsche and I in the end, I still wondered and worried about him. I am just the dumbest person I know. Why should I bother with a person that will never speak to me again, and who has probably blocked me from his memory at all costs? Because there was once a time that I loved him, and because that time existed, I will never forget him.
Oh, and his birthday is on July 9th if you want to drop him a line. I can't give you his email address, because I'm fairly sure he could sue me for that, but I'll make sure that your words are heard. If, you know, you have anything to say.
Happy Independence Day!

28 June 2010

Without You We Couldn't Do What We Do

Yes, it's time again for another post about my favorite Canadians, Rush! I'm a bit late on this one, actually. Last Friday, a super awesome thing happened. Rush got its star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame! Check this out! And here is Geddy stealing a baby! Sort of. The only trouble with this is that tons and tons of people--Rush fans, fanatics, and people who have just heard of Rush--saying that now they should be inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Well, I call shenanigans, because that's ridiculous. It is the opinion of many, including myself, that to be inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, while still alive, anyway, is to destroy your career, or to signify that you are now washed up and done with recording. For example, years ago, when I was off my nut about AC/DC they were inducted, and basically stopped recording. When they came out with Black Ice, it sounded like the same songs they had produced earlier, with sort of different lyrics. It really hurt to see them fall from grace like that. And the Iron Man 2 soundtrack--because I know someone will mention it--is mostly made of songs already recorded. Including Highway to Hell, which is secretly on every AC/DC album ever made.
The best thing to do is induct the artist posthumously; that way they can't do anything to make people wonder how they ever got into the Hall of Fame in the first place. Take Elvis Presley, for example. He was on a downhill spiral by the time he died in 1977. Imagine if he had been alive in 1986, when he was inducted. Would he still have been cranking out albums of himself talking (and shamelessly insulting) the audience at his concerts? [I wish I could say I was kidding around.] It's probably safe to say he would, because people will buy ANYTHING that has to do with The King, and thus, it made the most sense to induct him after his death. Many, many years after, when people had forgotten all the dumb shit he did toward the end of his life, and were able to only remember his pure awesomeness during the '50s and '60s.
I don't want Rush to be inducted until one of the guys dies, because then, Rush will be done. There is no Rush if Lee, Lifeson, or Peart is not still alive and kicking. Yes, there was once a Rush without Neil Peart, but that didn't last for long, now did it?

Stuff You Didn't Know

I am super bored right now. I saw Shrek 4 today, and that was awesome, but other than that... bored bored boredy bored bored. Cracked can't keep me interested tonight. Even the sweet new Lady Gaga song was only enough to hold me for five-ish minutes. And yes, I just posted about a minute ago, but that was purely to invoke the wrath of the Biebertards. Free publicity, you know. So, being completely bored, I've borrowed a post from one of my DA friend's blog, in order to thoroughly immerse myself with nonsense. Or something like that.


Spell your [real] name out in [Rush] songs.

E - Earthshine
R - Roll the Bones
I - I Think I'm Going Bald
N - Natural Science


– Name: Erin [You would have found out eventually.]
– Birth date: September 13, Nineteen Aught Eleventy-Twelve
– Nickname: Top 3 - Sushi, Teddy Bear, Cook
– Eye Color: Green
– Hair Color: Dyed red; unsure of natural color
– Zodiac Sign: Virgo


– The shoes you wore today: Black lace flats
– Your weakness(es): Short temper
– Your fear(s): Loss
– Your perfect pizza: Soooo much cheese
– Goal you’d like to achieve: Doctoral degree


– Your best physical feature? My eyes. They won't ever get fat.
– Your bedtime? 2 AM, on a good night
– Most missed memory? I miss hanging out with my Grandma Jean


This Or That...
– Pepsi or Coke?: Pepsi
– McDonald’s or Burger King: Steak 'N' Shake
– Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton.
– Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla.
– Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee


Do You...
– Curse: Shit no. What the hell are you talking about, you fucking asshole? [Don't be sad; I'd never call you that for real.]
– Sing: Yes, and I'm pretty good from what I hear
– Dance: Not near other people
– Take a shower everyday: Uh, no.
– Have a crush: Hmmm... Yes.
– Do you think you’ve been in love? A couple times
– Want to go to college: Well, I did already. How about university?
– Like(d) high school: Sometimes
– Want to get married: I surely do
– Get motion sickness: Only when I walk on glass floors
– Think you’re attractive: Depends on the day
– Think you’re a health freak: In some ways
– Get along with your parents: Mostly


In the past month...
– Gone to the mall: No, amazingly
– Eaten an entire box of Oreos: No
– Eaten Sushi: YESSSSSSS; and no, that's not cannibalism
– Been on stage: I don't recall
– Gone skating: No, but I went on bike rides
– Made homemade cookies: No
– Gone skinny dipping: Not yet
– Stolen anything: No


– Played a game that required removal of clothing: Strip poker!
– If so, was it mixed company: Yes!
- Flashed anyone: Also yes!
– Been beaten up: Nope
– Shoplifted: Only at the flea market


– Age you hope to be married: 26
– Number of Children: 2
– Describe your Dream Wedding: Outside. Lots of Rush. Marrying my best friend. Rainbow bridesmaids!


In a boyfriend/girlfriend...
– Best eye color?: Doesn't matter, as long as I can lose myself in their eyes
– Best hair color?: Also doesn't matter, as long as they let me play with it
– Short hair or long hair? Preferably long, though short haircuts are fun, too, sometimes
– Height: Taller than me


– Number of people I could trust with my life: One
– Number of CDs that I own: Legitimate or burned? Either way, it's a lot.
– Number of tattoos: Zero
– Number of piercings: Seven


Who were you with yesterday? Severe, Mama Bear, Ladybug, and Sunshine - aka my family
What woke you up this morning? My mom, to get me to fix the pool
Is tomorrow going to be a good day? Hell yes; Beatles Rock Band ALL DAY!
Do you like anybody? No, I hate everything. Just kidding.


Ever thrown up in public? A couple times
What’s on your mind RIGHT NOW? FREAKIN' ROCK BAND! Oh, and my new Etsy account. BUY MY SHIT!


What kind of home would you like? One that's not overwhelming
What do you want to be when you grow up? A marriage and family therapist
Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Almost married, and almost done with school


Do you like candy necklaces? They hurt my teeth
When was the last time you fell over or ran into something? Recently
Do you still go trick or treating? Yes! Younger siblings mean I can trick-or-treat for years!
What was the last thing you ate? Melty ice cream
What's your favorite type of soda? Pepsi
Have you ever moved? Three times
Have you ever won an award? Bunches. I'm not even showing off; I have no idea how many.
Are you listening to music right now? No, iTunes is being a bitch
How long til your birthday? Lesseee..... 77
When were you the saddest in your whole life? Wow, that's a tough one. I don't think I want to talk about that.
What time is it? 12:17 AM
Do you use ebay to buy or sell? Both
Ever heard a song written about you? No
Something you want to happen in 2010? I'm finally going to university, after waiting two more years than I should have had to.
Honestly, do you miss 2008? A little bit; I graduated then, so I have a few found memories.


1. Honestly, what color is your underwear? Black
2. Honestly, what's on your mind? iTunes, and it's suckishness
3. Honestly, what are you doing right now? Doing this so I can read the six Cracked articles I have tabbed
4. Honestly, have you done something bad today? I wasn't very nice today.
5. Honestly, who is the last person you talked to on the phone? Freak
6. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? Not especially
7. Honestly, what makes you mad most of the time? Family
8. Honestly, do you bite your nails? All the time
9. Honestly, have you had an eating disorder? I BEAT ANOREXIA. Not really, though.
10. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment? This moment, and the next one, and the one after that...
11. Honestly, are you keeping a big secret now? Nah.
12. Honestly, do you have a friend you don’t actually like? I try not to bother with people I don't actually like
13. Honestly, what was the last text message you received? It was too long ago to remember
14. Honestly, are you in denial? About what?
15. Honestly, do you get up in the middle of the night? I'm already up in the middle of the night
16. Honestly, do you like anyone? Yes
17. Honestly, does anyone like you? Maybe


1. What do you do when you’re mad? Freak the hell out
2. What’s the worst thing you’ve done when you were mad? Throw one of my sisters at a wall
3. Ever made anyone cry when you were mad? Yes
4. Do you swear when you’re mad? I just swear in general


1. When was the last time you actually cried? During Toy Story 3
2. Ever cried yourself to sleep? Many, many times
3. Do certain songs make you cry? Yes
4. What usually makes you cry? Pretty much anything


1. Are you usually a happy person? That depends on who you ask. I don't think I am, but Spock begs to differ.
2. What makes you the happiest? Things going the way they should
3. What song makes you always happy? Hope, by Rush - it's our song
4. Do you believe in yourself? How corny. But yeah, I do.
5. When people say they think you are good looking/pretty, do you get happy? No, I generally don't believe them.

That's all for now, folks.

I stealz the basis of this blog post from

27 June 2010

Bieber Fever

Okay, shortest post EVAR. Can someone out there please explain to me what the deal is with Justin Bieber? Why is he so popular? I mean, I love Canada with a burning passion, but that kid just has no appeal to me. Hopefully, I have called down enough Bieber-tard wrath that one of you people will explain this to me. And possibly call me a Nazi. I quite enjoy that.

22 June 2010

Ready, Set, Please Don't Make Me Watch This Again!

When I was younger, I was absolutely mortified by a movie called The Halloween Tree. I can't even remember why, but I couldn't watch it without crying, and I've never seen the end. The reason I'm telling you this is because I happened across The Halloween Tree while doing a library search for media involving Leonard Nimoy but not Star Trek. [Taking Trek out cuts the list down by about 90%, in case you're wondering.] I had no idea Leonard Nimoy was in The Halloween Tree, because the last time I tried to watch it was at least a decade ago. So, I put the movie on order, mostly because I wanted to figure out why it's so damn terrifying, and of course, because Leonard Nimoy is, in my world, the human equivalent of God. The movie came in, I popped it into a VCR, and...
90 Minutes Later
I am almost twenty goddamn years old, and that movie is still scary as shit. But, now that I am an articulate adult, with a pen and paper sitting right beside me, I can tell you precisely why I was afraid to walk up my stairs in the pitch-blackness of my house after watching The Halloween Tree.
First off, it's a cartoon based on a book by Ray Bradbury. I've read a lot of Bradbury's work, and while I enjoy it, most of it is not suitable for children. He's a spooky guy, even if he's not exactly trying to be. Oh, he's also the narrator of the movie. The Halloween Tree also features one of the spookiest soundtracks I've ever heard for a cartoon; those vocalists haunted my nightmares. Then, after the intro, the children show up. These kids, apart from the token fatty, are skeleton-thin, and not just the one actually dressed as a skeleton. Then, when the kids gather into their little clique and realize their buddy Pip, the "greatest kid on earth," is missing, they take a trip through the forest from Snow White to get to his house. I am dead serious; this forest wanted to eat those kids alive. But all that weirdness seems minor when compared to Leonard Nimoy's character, Mr. Moundshroud. He is, among other things, a "scary yellow pointy magic bastard"--at least, that's what I have in my notes. When the bony kids make it to his house, which also wants to eat them, they see Pip, who is clear, climbing a tree growing pumpkins, which are apparently souls, and then flies away clutching a pumpkin that looks like his face. Oh, and a sidenote: in order to get Pip back, Moundshroud and the band of anorexic children must go to the "Undiscovered Country". Yes, like in Star Trek. Oh, and in order to get to the Undiscovered Country, they have to fly a time-traveling kite, made out of pieces circus posters that are alive and trying to eat them. Fun. Thankfully that gets torn to shreds when they land in Egypt. Okay, at this point in my notes, I wondered if I was just a sissy when I was little, and I decided to stop writing things down until I was truly spooked. But then, Moundshroud's cape turned into bat wings and he started to fly. Maybe every single thing that happens in this movie really is disturbing as hell. Later in the movie, in France, it is revealed that Moundshroud can't walk on holy ground. Is he the Devil, or the Grim Reaper or something? Nothing extraordinarily bad happens until they get to Mexico, during Dia de los Muertes. There we find Pip in a crypt, stuck in a giant spider web, surrounded by animated corpses. When the first of the skinny children tries to touch him, he turns to dust. I have pinpointed this as the exact point in the movie where I ran screaming from the room. Right about there. Well, not this time. This time I just watched in awe, wondering why the film was ever made. That, and why it features, among all those other frightening things, soul-sucking sugar skulls. Try saying that ten times fast.
Here, I made this for you:


13 June 2010

The Invisible Child-Eating Crocodiles that Live Absolutely Everywhere

Have you ever gotten a forward filled with funny, Photoshopped versions of children's books, all with seemingly the worst possible content and titles? Well, I get them a lot, and they never fail to amuse me, almost to the point of falling-out-of-my-chair laughter. ROFLing, if you will. I've written a half-dozen or so unpublished children's books, mostly for school, but I've never reached the raunchy caliber of some of the 'Shopped horrors that I have found while trolling about the internet. I hadn't thought about them for a while, but today I ran across another or Cracked.com's Photoshop contests. I'd like to share that, and a few more links to awful conceptions of books that should never be read by anyone, let alone children.
Just as a warning, a lot of these may be NSFW. That is, Not Safe for Work, for the less acronym-savvy among my readership.
Books Your Local Library Will Probably Not Have in Their Children's Section
Cracked: The 40 Most Inappropriate Children's Book Covers
DeviantART: Evil Children's Books
TresSugar: Recalled Children's Books
SlashFilm: Pixar Artist Josh Cooley’s Lil’ Inappropriate Golden Book Movies R Fun
Listverse: Kids Books Your School Doesn’t Stock: Part I & Part II
Something Awful: Children's Books: This goes on for 10 pages. And they are all awesome.
Huffington Post: The Creepiest Children's Books EVER: They all exist. For real.
For those of you who don't have the greatest internet connection, here are a few list-only links
1Funny: Top 50 Children's Book Title Ideas
Lots of Jokes: Children's Books Not Recommended by the National Library Association
University of Michigan: Children's Book Titles You'll Never See
Facebook: Children's Book Titles Never Published
For people with quick, amazing, awesome internet unlike me, here is a video.
Strong Bad E-mail: Kid's Book
And yes, I know that there are some repeats across these lists. But how many awful parodies of juvenile literature did you honesty want in existence?

11 June 2010

The Feverish Flux of Human Interface and Interchange

Time to start talking about Rush again. Today was the one and only American screening of Beyond the Lighted Stage, the Rush documentary. I, for one, am glad I was smart enough to pre-order tickets online. When Spock and I got to the theater, the show was sold out. There were maybe three seats left by the time everyone got there. I severely underestimated Rush's impact on northeastern Illinois, I guess. There were so many of us! But, in retrospect [pun intended], I'm not all that surprised. The movie was great. It's not getting that great of reviews, but then, Rush never has. And they make a point of saying that. Giving Beyond the Lighted Stage bad reviews is along the same lines as burning copies of Fahrenheit 451; the action only serves to drive home the point that the movie/book is making.
But, back to humor. I've never been in a theater that was so... loud! Well, apart from Rocky Horror and Repo! shows. But those are meant to be especially raucous. This was like going to a concert. Which reminds me... Spock and I decided to split the cost of tickets to one of the shows Rush is doing in Chicago. This morning I found tickets on Ticketmaster that are $49.50 each, which, while it might sound expensive to some, are the cheapest tickets I have ever seen for a Rush concert. Ahhhh... Now that that's over with, I have a little bit more to discuss about the movie. Okay, Jack Black is great and all, in his own right, but I really didn't want to see him in his usual semi-retarded state in a movie about my favorite band. He's more of an irritant than an actor. Other than that, most of the people who were interviewed behaved fairly well. And the home videos and childhood pictures that were shown were practically a treasure unto themselves. We got to see Rush perform when they were younger than I am, in basements and bars. Not basement bars, though; at least, I don't think so. Sorry, no more puns.
The musical selection was good, although most of the tunes are the same few songs that show up on every greatest hits album Rush has ever made-- Chronicles, the Retrospectives, et cetera. I think that, with the extensive catalog Rush has put together, there could have been a lot more deep tracks. After all, this is a movie made for Rush fans, by, presumably, Rush fans. With that, I present to you my suggestions for...
15 Rush Songs that Should have been Included in Beyond the Lighted Stage
Alphabetized, in order to avoid a ruckus
1. Available Light, from Presto
2. Chemistry, from Signals
3. Cinderella Man, from A Farewell to Kings
4. Different Strings, from Permanent Waves
5. Digital Man, from Signals
6. Here Again, from Rush
7. Hope, from Snakes and Arrows - Spock and I were sad that our song wasn't included
8. I Think I'm Going Bald, from Caress of Steel
9. Leave That Thing Alone!, from Counterparts
10. Madrigal, from A Farewell to Kings
11. Mission, from Hold Your Fire
12. Resist, from Test for Echo
13. Summertime Blues, from Feedback
14. Tears, from 2112
15. Vital Signs, from Moving Pictures
And some Lerxst rants! That last one is totally worth the wait
So, apart from Jack Black and a lack of deep-cut tracks--wow, that's a lot of rhymes-- I absolutely adored Beyond the Lighted Stage. And I can't wait for the VH1 premiere on June 26th, so I can watch it again!

08 June 2010

No Zombie Is Safe from Chicago Ted

On Saturday, June 5th, 2010, in a move that unequivocally proved to my family that I do in fact think that every day is Hallowe'en, I dressed up as a zombie and lurched my way through downtown Chicago. Otaku, her girlfriend [let's call her Squeak], and I had heard about Zombie March Chicago 3 through Facebook, which is where we hear about most fun things, and decided to give it a try. I kept notes throughout the day, in order to compile a checklist of...

Things To Do: Zombie March Edition
Spray fake blood on clothes, floor, etc.
Get fake blood all over tub, hands,
Take a ton of pictures - repeat as necessary
Learn how much I have in common with Squeak [it's almost ridiculous]
Load blood-soaked clothes into large trash bag
Load clothes, make-up, camera equipment, people into small car
Drive and yell at cars and drive and get Mountain Dew and drive
Listen to awesome tunes: Daft Punk, The Birthday Massacre, My Chemical Romance
Yell, "FUCK YOU BP!" because fuck you, BP
Close Squeak's bank account
Drive more
Realize that we are all using the same tone of voice, and all sound like we're seven
Go to Squeak's second cousin's eight grade graduation party; watch family shenanigans; receive free food
PRODUCT IDEA: T-shirt - "Don't touch me; I'm sick. No, seriously. I am."
See Hindu temple; freak out
Put on much make-up; get dressed in bloody, damp zombie clothes
Try to catch train; go to wrong train station
Fall asleep during drive to Chicago
Go. Stop. Go. Stop. Go. Stop. TURN!
Get to Chicago two hours after march has started; zombie it up anyway
PRODUCT IDEA: Bumper sticker - "I have a horn, too."
Park car; put on more fake blood
Look for other zombies
Find one zombie, one homeless person, get distraught, go to Starbucks
Explain esoteric American culture to Chinese tourists; try to explain what zombies are
Find nice zombies, asshole zombies, mohawk zombies, zombies with sweet pants
Here the phrase, "Can I ask you a question? I keep seeing all these zombies..." about two dozen times
Get picture taken twice by people who asked, a billion other times by people who didn't
See someone whip out a video camera as you lurch past them in full zombie regalia
Scare the shit out of small children, especially that one little girl who looked like she was going to cry
Realize that your feet hurt, because you've been walking/lurking for several hours
Hear the phrase, "Why are you doing this?" over and over again
Have one person ask you, "Do you dress like that every day?" Do not punch this person.
Cut bottoms of Otaku's pants off with a key and a pen; this takes skillz
Have a total Rush-gasm over Rush carpet, Quebec license plate, Ontario Street, Rush Street
Find car; drive to Squeak's house
Take shower to wash fake blood off
Eat ice cream and drink orange pop while watching True Crime channel until midnight
Drive home

For more information about the Zombie March, as well as other zombie-related activities in Chicago [there are far more that you'd think there would be], visit Chicago Zombie.

Next year, Spock and I plan to go as zombie Vulcans, complete with green blood. Don't take our idea, or I'll eat your brains.